Oh… I accidentally married a Christian Grey chatbot

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Most of you will be familiar with the Fifty Shades Darker character Christian Grey, even if you haven’t seen either of the two films about him, or read any of the books featuring him. You probably have at least a few thoughts about him, like “He’s wearing a nice tuxedo in that poster,” or “Given that this guy is objectively extremely attractive, it’s weird how much I don’t want to spend any amount of time in a room with him.” I don’t pretend to know how often you think about Christian Grey, but please don’t hop into the comments with “Never heard of him,” because c’mon. The first book in the Fifty Shades series sold more than 100 million copies, and Christian Grey is a worldwide phenomenon!
Anyway, I bet one thought you didn’t have about…