The “haul” video or photo set is an internet-only art form that’s mostly been documented as it appears on Tumblr’s notorious shoplifting blogs, Reddit’s cosmetic and fashion communities, and YouTube’s merch unboxing channels. If you’re unfamiliar, it is exactly what it sounds like. You bring home a “haul” of new, enviable (usually expensive) goods and display them for the internet to comment on and admire. “Here are some things I now own, please respond,” is the message of a haul post, and lots of people do respond.

It’s a weird, brazen recognition of the reverence we have for good branding and for clean, new, disposable items that cost a lot of money, and it’s never done much for me before. I don’t care about anyone else’s new Nike Air…

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